Why?

When it comes down to it what is your why?

Think about that for a minute I’ll wait.

It doesn’t have to be weight loss related. You might be skinny fat already. Just kind of in blah mode. That happens. Or you might work your ass off to give your kids a better life. That is your why, your reason, your essence.

If you’re reading this then you know that the blog chronicles almost the last six years of my life.

So what is my Why?

I started this journey 5 1/2 or so years ago 170 pounds heavier. I had a lot of why’s then.

As I got further along the journey they seem to all melt into one big chocolate bar. See what I did there. mmm chocolate.

My why in November 2019 is a lot different than what it was in December 2013 when I had my epiphany on stage. Never read that? Click here.  Or keep moving along.

It is so fucking stupid, to say you want to live your best life. But I have to tell you that if you worry about fitting in an airplane seat, sitting at a table with your friends comfortably, never wanting to go to new places, sporting events, concerts, because you’re not sure if you can fit and/or stand and or tolerate the experience. Let me tell you you are not living your best life, and you’re not even living life whatsoever.

My Why has morphed into a new truth that I don’t want to watch the world go by me from my recliner. That might be the old me but it is not 2019 Franco and it definitely will not be 2020 Franco.

I told a friend today that was sore from a work out to remember that next time they wanted to put something silly in their mouth. Probably cocky of me, but early on in the journey you pay for that stuff. You are constantly getting on and off the scale wondering what the fuck is going on some days. Guess what you can’t outwork out a bad diet. No matter how many calories you try to burn, if you are eating crap, you’re going to look and feel like crap. It’s that simple. I am not a doctor, I do not play one on TV, I have just tried everything.

I wanted to get a big boy job, I wanted people to take me seriously. I didn’t want to walk into an interview and not fit in the chair. I didn’t want to worry about going to a hockey game and needing ADA seating cause I could not fit.

You are fat. You are a disheveled slob. You must be lazy. I mean why would anyone want to hire you. You obviously can’t be good at whatever job you want because I mean look at you. You are a fucking mess.

That’s fucked up shit right there in that paragraph above. FUCKED UP! But that’s every day. Fat people are stereo typed and thought in the business world as lazy. I have seen it with my own eyes. My WHY! I will to let myself fall too far from my final goal. It will not happen. I can go on and on here and you can shake your head saying no… no way.. but it’s true. You won’t hire me are your personal trainer even though I’ve lost 170lbs. You want the adonis looking dude. Well guess what? Chances are he doesn’t know what you are going through like I would. Just saying. But that’s the world we live in.

Ugh.  It’s Friday afternoon.  I need a drink.

So where are we? What is the magic number. This morning the magic number is 27. Better then last weeks 32 for sure. I went to two Flyers games this week too, just saying.

The Peloton? It’s been here for a week. So far I am still in love and look forward to my vagina, I mean my ass, I mean my entire lower private area killing me when I get on. I have been on this thing 45 – 60 minutes a day. I love it. I have tried a few different classes and am motivated to get on it daily.

I have done over 18 rides in the last week. I’ve burned over 5000 cal on it. I have also rode over 90 miles and will probably break 100 by the weeks end. I will not let this thing sitting in my living room defeat me. I will make it my bitch. So far I love the bicycle that goes nowhere.

I hope everyone is having a great week.

It’s Friday. Carve out some space for you. sleep. Dance. Drink. Work out. Just do you.

What is your why?

I want to be present and live.

With much love,

Franco