Archives for January 2018

Thank You For Saying Goodbye

January 25, 2018 By franco 4 Comments

So many friends and people come into your life on the journey and I have had so many in various aspects of my life and what I have done in it. Lately it seems like this Irish goodbye is a real thing and not only at parties but in life, friendships and relationships. It makes me sad. People think that my liking your photo on Instagram or because they looked at your stupid snapchat of your chocolate peanut butter on double fiber bread that they are in your life and guess what that’s not what it’s all about. My friends call me, text me… ask me how I am doing… give me a shoulder to lean on even when I want them to fuck off. That’s real. Don’t confuse the two. I used to tell my bandmates that I saw you called but you didn’t leave a message so I guess you didn’t need me. I am not calling anyone back from a missed call. Is that silly? I dunno. Why can’t people leave a message anymore.

But this irish goodbye happens with friendships and relationships too. And I guess it happens to me, around me and I get to see it unfold around me with others. One minute a person could be practically crawling up your butt for attention and then they are ghosts. But I learned a long time ago that with my schedule and lack of social life outside of work, that I was hard to maintain a friendship with. And yet even when ghosted, I am always there when I end up being needed. I guess that’s the Italian guilt that is instilled on all Italian males. We have a weird fucking mental thing going on while others can just make full of shit excuses.

I think in the end I wish life was more social and not just through a device in my hand. Don’t get me wrong, I love being able to see what my family is up to and my god daughters. But when you are sitting there wondering why you have 3000 facebook friends and don’t know who to invite over to watch a football game… then something is wrong with the algorithm. But hey, even with your silence, thank you for saying goodbye.

Speaking of Football game. FUCKING A, the Philadelphia Eagles are going to the Superbowl. The town is bursting with joy and I am happy too. Wish they were playing this weekend because I can hardly wait.

Anyway I am going to keep this short today but I guess I’ll talk about my journey for 2018 so far and where I am. Guess what I still have 50lbs to lose in 2018. If you’ve been reading along, you know that I am eating whole foods and last week my coach and trainer upped my food intake even more. So I am maintaining that starting weight while I seem to be able to eat more and more. It’s 2200 calories so if you think I am at McDonalds or ordering out every day you are crazy. That’s not happening. Did I have a little bit of leeway during the football game? Sure I did. But I didn’t go apeshit crazy. I have goals. I think we’ll be going with this fixing my metabolism for a little longer and ten we are going to start cutting some weight. I have to go to my mom and dads 50^th wedding anniversary at the end of April so I am going to look and feel the best that I can and with my step-sons wedding in January. FUCK THE WORLD I am going to look good. And in the end more importantly I am going to feel good. My workouts have been on point. Making great progress

I feel good now. I think the cold sucks the life out of me but I am doing my best to keep the bounce in my step and keep a smile on my face.

Thank you for all the comments and love to last weeks blog. Glad to see you guys out there still following along.

Go Eagles!

Franco

Moderation

January 18, 2018 By franco 5 Comments

So today I wanted to start a blog off with the truth about moderation. A few days ago we are cleaning up after a gig and my keyboard player Dave was talking about how we should go get pizza after a wedding the following week in Westchester. Now I knew that I was going to my friend Ken’s house the following day and Ken and his wife Dottie are two of my dearest friends, but they are not good for anyone to be on a diet near. They will give you the clothes off their back as well as every single ounce of food in the refrigerator. When I started this I knew that I was going there so I made sure that their house would be my first cheat meal of the two-week run. So I said to Dave that I couldn’t do it, and then crabby the bass player, also been working very hard to get his health under control, said “everything in moderation”.

So I’ve been thinking about this for a few weeks now. Everything in moderation. It seems to be a thing that everyone says who really doesn’t have a problem with moderation. (Or maybe they do) I must have a problem with it. You can’t eat whatever you want for breakfast and call it moderation. You can’t go have a 10 Wings instead of 12 and call it moderation. You can’t eat half a pizza instead of a whole pizza and call it moderation. I can’t go to the gym twice a day and watch everything I eat all week long to be moderate all weekend. If I was in maintenance mode maybe, but definitely not me.

I think people really use moderation as their excuse. This has nothing to do with crabby obviously because he was probably just busting balls. But I have been thinking about it because it’s one thing to let yourself have a cookie or two every so often and it’s another thing to have a cookie or two every single day. Moderation is a very tricky word and even trickier to integrate into your healthier lifestyle.. I never really over ate. I just never really liked anything that was actually good for me. I wish that I can open up a grab bag of potato chips and not eat the whole bag, but that’s not me.

It’s just really something to think about and I am curious if anyone is actually reading what your thoughts are.

I will tell you what’s going on with me but something else happen recently that I wanted to write about. (Not matter what I probably won’t get my true feelings out on paper here cause it’s hard) – Not too long ago and I won’t pinpoint what night because I don’t want anyone really to look that deeply into this, I heard someone say, “hey look they have a token.” And to be quite honest I didn’t like it very much, so I spun around very quickly, and told him that he was talking about my twin brother, it just blurted out.. the idiots looked all sorts of confused and I walked away. I don’t really know what came over me, but I wasn’t in the place to start a screaming match with people that were drinking heavily either. I Don’t know if they’re trying to be funny with their friends but “we” can pick on my twin brother for going to an almost all-white school, we can pick on him for being from the islands, we can pick on him because almost everyone thinks he’s a bass player, and he can pick on me for whatever he wants, but “We” are family. I know anything that would come out of his mouth towards me wouldn’t be fueled with malice. I would hope that he would defend me too, and I’m sure there have been times where I’ve have needed it and I am not about anyone else having a comment towards any of my band mates in my presence no matter how much they fucking annoy me at times. I don’t know if it’s the current climate in our country but people just seem to think they can say whatever they want anymore. Our president will be gone in a few years but compassion and love will always be needed, for us, for our children, and for better world. I mean so many amazing people doing what I do for living. I’ve met so many awesome people we’re fighting the fight every single day writing this blog and on my personal social media. I just don’t understand why people say such hurtful things. It’s caused me to really reevaluate the way I speak, and say things, and I am also doing my best to be a better person. There is still time left for me for sure. My twin brother likes to say that blacks don’t crack. I sure as shit wish that I got those genes from mom, because my shit is cracking all over.

So I guess it is time to talk more about me. This week I posted something on Instagram about hating the scale because it has not been my friend. We are now at 48 is the magic number. I let it get me for a few hours but snapped out of it pretty quickly at the gym. My coach did not seem to be very concerned and actually asked me to eat more food. I am leaning out, I am lifting more and more weight, sooner or later when we get my metabolism rocking everything will fall into place. But let me tell you the mindfuck that happens when you get on the scale and you see those numbers either not move or go up a few pounds. Now I understand that I am inflamed because of my new death eater tattoo on my Harry Potter sleeve but it’s very hard to convince yourself that first thing in the morning standing on your scale naked while your cat really judges you. So I’m working my ass off, and I think it’s coming off literally, it’s just that the scale isn’t working the way I’d like it to work. I am frustrated but I am not worried. I’ll know even better when I go to put my jeans on to go to work on Friday night. I am committed to the long run. I will have some appetizers and a good time during Eagles game but I will also prepare for it. That will be my cheat meal for the week. Win or lose. We have to get up the next day and continue with life.

I have to do a much better job of walking the walk. It’s kinda like that friend you have that posts million things about the gym or their new life or the change they are making in their life. And you are their friend, and you know flat out that they’re posting shit but it’s bull. No matter how many social media posts you make you still have to walk the walk and back them up. There is a reason why I only have shared this blog once or twice on my Facebook page in four years and that was because I was afraid a falling flat on my face on this journey. I had done this before, I had screamed it from the mountains, look at me look at me. And then I fell flat on my face. Life happened. And it broke me. I know we aren’t supposed to worry about what other people think or see in us but likes and comments and emojis have really changed that. I really don’t think there is any going back at this point. I want to inspire others to not only get healthier, but to be happier. If the grass is greener on the other side then water the grass that you have. Sooner or later it will be just as green. You might not lose 20 pounds in a month like your friend does, it might take six months, but eitherway you will lose the 20 pounds.

It is a great time to be from Philadelphia right now with the Eagles proving that they might not be the best team, they might never get the Super Bowl win, but they sure as hell are going to show the commitment that it takes to try and get there. No matter what I am going through right now with not seeing what I want to see on the scale this is where commitment comes in way more than motivation.

I hope everyone has a fantastic week. My local friends from Philadelphia please be safe, enjoy yourselves, I’ll be home in my chair with the dogs just enjoying life. I hope that some of the love that Dr. Martin Luther King had for everyone rubs off on us all. I am doing my best to make sure that there is no room in my heart for any kind of hate whatsoever. That’s all we can do right?

Be good to each other,

Franco

Take A Polaroid Picture

January 12, 2018 By franco 1 Comment

On New Years Eve my friend Gina wanted to take a million selfies. That’s what she does. She’s that mom. Playing at Parx Casino already makes my head spin and then you add New Years Eve, all he people, my phone blowing about tickets, another band.. a Dj.. for the band leader it’s overwhelming. I didn’t want any parts of selfie time. She wasn’t happy and neither was Donella and a few others. Gina has a ton of selfies from 2017. She has seen the band with her friends a lot, and that makes me very happy. So I should have gracefully taken the photos and there a few taken under protest…

But the reason I tell you all this is that a few days ago while I was lifting at the gym I was listening to one of my favorite punk, alt rockers, Frank Turner… he has a song called Polaroid Picture and one little chorus in the song hit me hard..

Let go of the little distractions
Hold close to the ones that you love
Because we won’t all be here this time next year
So while you can take a picture of us

We all won’t be here this time next year. I’ve lost friends who have been reading this in the last few years. I’ve lost clients at the photo studio to cancer.. accidents.. addiction. So I never really thought about it. I’ve always been the keep of memories. I’ve always liked taking pictures. I had a camera with me in college when no one else ever did and i have the most memories saved for my friends and fraternity brothers. We have lost quite a few of those too. So next time, no matter what is going on with me, I’m going to try harder to stop, be in the moment and let the photos fly. Although I am sure that all our mutual friends are sick of looking at us.

I knew it was coming there week and I’ve hit the week two weight loss pause. Nothing crazy new to report on that.. I have hit the gym hard, I’ve done exactly what I was told. My meal plan, my strength programming, all hit close to perfect.
Yes, chocolate chip cookies and fresh italian bread creeped into the house and made things a little harder but we’ve gotten by. Tuesday was my weigh in day and on Tuesday the number was 45. Today it’s 46 so we’ll see what weigh in brings on Tuesday morning again. My body hurts. I am tired, drained and sore. But it’s definitely a good sore.

Watching “This is us” this week cause 1. I’m basic and 2. There is not hockey this week and there were some hard to watch things with Kate and her weight and the snack sneaking. I don’t sneak the snacks or the food now cause I’m a grown ass man and I am accountable and responsible for everything I put in my body no matter what. But I know I was always rewarded with food when I was younger. I would have money and I would sneak fast food or stops at the pizza place alone on my way home from school. Brought back a lot of thoughts.

Well It’s a shitty rain friday here in Philly and I spent way too much time at the Allergist this morning and my meals are off, I ned coffee and no matter what have to finish my program for the week which chest and shoulders to rock out my friday.

I am out here screaming that I want to get better. Why does everything so bad for you have to taste so good.

We are 12 days into the year. I hope you are on the path that you want to be.

Love and stuff,

Franco

The Road to Better

January 6, 2018 By franco 3 Comments

The marketing guru in me knows that posting a blog on a Saturday morning is going to end up being more for me and not many readers. Everyone is off doing weekend things or thawing their asses off in the heat because it’s cold up here in Philadelphia and Bucks County PA but I don’t care.. We have something to lift our protein shakers to and celebrate… Today marks the official 4 year anniversary of this blog… So if you haven’t been with me from the start, let me post a few links for you and help you out with a quick refresher. Don’t feel bad, I didn’t think I’d be here for 4 years later either….

The First Day of Change – January 6, 2014

How I got here and why.. January 29, 2015

The recap after year one – January 6, 2015

Reading back through all my old blogs over the last few days has taken me on a nostalgic trip and brought up a lot of feelings good and bad.

I took photos of this beautiful young lady who had hit a fitness goal a few years ago, she was way to young to be struggling with her weight and I think it was mostly being 21 and the late nights, dates, drinking etc….. then after the goal she put a lot of weight on and I could tell her posts changed… and then I lost track of her for a little while when I separated my photography studio Instagram and made a new one. We recently reconnected from mutual tags on photos and her reply to a friend of hers on one of her photos really has become a reflection point for me this week and into 2018. A friend of hers wrote something along the lines of “I wish I had your motivation”. So many people think it’s posting 1000 memes about how strong you are and want to be…. But her reply was rather simple and 1000% the truth after I thought about it for a few days…. “I’ve always had motivation, that doesn’t get you as far as commitment does”

Motivation for me has always been there. I think I’ve told this story before….. It was 2 days before I was supposed to start high school and back then for the first year you could wear corduroy pants. I remember my dad calling my mom at the shore upset cause he couldn’t find any in a size 40. So it’s always stuck with me that I was a size 40 jeans on my first day of high school. 2 years ago the store I get my Nautica jeans at was having a buy 1 get 1 half so I bought the 42’s I was slowly getting into and then said fuck it, I am going to buy the 40’s too. Those have always been my motivation. Get my ass into those jeans. I was almost there this summer before my hernia surgery. What I didn’t have during the surgery and recovery was the commitment to stay on track as I ate and drank whatever I wanted full knowing that it would be that much harder to get back to where I was. So motivation can get you started… you want to wear that slinky gold dress to you high school reunion, you don’t want to be a sloppy fat ass anymore….. etc… It’s commitment that keeps you going…

So here I am 4 years later.. Still going. Still motivated. Still committed. Still trying. Still rising. Still falling. Still trying to get to that magical place in my head that will bring me the ultimate happiness.

THANK YOU for being here. My support team is the best.

This week has been a good one for sure. If you read last weeks blog I laid out my goals for 2018. I’ll list them real quick in case you don’t want to go hunting for it. These are in no certain order.

Travel to 2 places that I have never been to.
get stronger, lean my body out and lose 50lbs in 2018
find a job that makes me happy
look and FEEL the best that I can at Brandon (my son’s) wedding a year from yesterday!
Get back in the helicopter and soar about Wildwood

That’s the gist of it. So since you know that the magic number for 2018 is 50. If you follow me on Twitter, Snapchat (yes, I turned it back on due to popular demand) and Instagram, if you see me post 44 to go…. That’s your inside cue and whats left to get to my goal so btw…. 44 to go! Told you it’s been a good reset for me.

I have a whole new strength program from coach to put into effect come Monday. I am excited. My water intake and food has been perfect this week. Right on point, no cheating. I am also not going to drink for as long as I can hold off. Hopefully till my birthday in February.

Oh and NYE was of the hook for me on stage. I felt great. I looked okay and just let myself have fun.

I have to get to gym. I am looking forward to my rest day tomorrow, holy mackerel. My body needs a break and going to the Flyers game for Amber’s Birthday. Going to be interesting not eating or drinking anything there for sure. But there is that commitment word again… see how it’s always floating around….

Thank you for reading. Thank you for being here.

Franco