Archives for April 2015

Maybe It’s Just Me!

April 30, 2015 By franco Leave a Comment

Sitting in a doctors office this week, I sat in the chair playing with my phone. I am addicted to Simpson’s Tapped Out. Freaking game. I looked up for a second and saw something that only a few months ago would have given me a small panic attack. I am not kidding honestly. Chairs with side arms were something that almost brought me to tears. These things haunted me in my weight gain. Movie theater seats. Reception hall seats. Airplane seats. Concert hall seats. All have a slim ass line. All are usually no more than 38 inches wide or so. All kept me from fitting. All gave me anxiety. All made me cry more than once. You might not think much about chairs. I do. Chairs. They are everywhere. You can walk into a job interview feeling so confident and see a chair that you can’t really fit in and you are sitting on the edge of it… and it will throw you off your game. It’s heartbreaking. It keeps your from buying hockey tickets… concert tickets. airplane tickets. It makes you isolated. Unless you lived it, you can’t understand this one. A simple chair.

The fact that I was sitting across from this chair, in a chair just like it brought things full circle once again for me. I fit again. The switch went off.

For easier reading purposes OTF means Orange Theory Fitness and DCBC is Dan Campos Boot Camp. Okay? Good.

My #DCBC peeps came to OTF and worked out with me this week. — My #DCBC peeps at OTF

This week I made it to bootcamp on 4 times since last Thursday and OTF 4 times. My workouts have been on point. My eating, not so much. I think I have to start meal prepping and sticking to it but honestly. That sucks. I see people doing and I want to do it. But after one or two meals of the same crap I want to kill myself. So I might only be prepping a day or two out.

I didn’t lose anything this week. Gained about 1/2 a pound and that sucks because on Friday last week I had lost 2.5 pounds almost over night and was so excited going into the weekend that it kept me in check. So I don’t know. Maybe when I come home from OCMD this weekend I have have to meal prep a little and make sure I hit my calories and not go over. It’s 12 pounds to my next goal. The lose it app says that I need 47 days to do it. I don’t need 47 days. I need self control and I need to put in the time.

My #DCBC peeps came to OTF and worked out with me this week. It was nice. I even got the owner of OTF to work out with me this week. She says that she was going to do it anyway but I know it was my Italian charm that got her on the treadmill sweating with us. There was actually 4 staffers rocking a workout with me. It’s nice to see them buy into the product they are selling. It’s a good workout. I wish my body would handle a few two a days because I would force myself to do it.

I went to see Butch Walker at the TLA Tuesday night with Amber. It’s

Two of my favorite photos that I snapped.

part of my no fear movement. I had a great time, the show was amazing. I have tickets to see Ryan Adam’s with my buddy Aram in 2 weeks DE and you know what. I know we have seats, and I m not scared. I am not nervous. I am going to be fine and I am going to have a good time.

I got a new Butch T-Shirt. It looked like material that was going to shrink a little so I got a 2x so that maybe it would last a few rounds in the washer before it became a belly shirt on me. I went so many years wanting

concert shirts and not being able to get them in my size that I have a very hard time saying no. I try to talk myself into not needing a 25 dollar t-shirt but there I go, off to get one. I remember taking two buses to the Oxford Valley Mall to the Way Out because I called and they said they had a few Motley Crue T-shirts in 2xl. They were in bags so I bought two with every last penny that I had on me with enough money to take the bus home and then when I got home they were still too tight. I hung one up in the garage at the shore house. Grandma always laughed at my posters in the garage at the shore.

So what do I do this week that I didn’t do last week? I worked my ass off I thought. Why doesn’t the scale support that effort? I’ve been on this journey long enough to not run to McDonald’s for lunch but something has to give for me. 12 pounds. I’ll be under 300 pounds. I really need to get there for many reasons. I think the #1 reason being that part of me doesn’t think I can do it. I get all these words of encouragement but the mind is a terrible bitch. Brutal.

I am signed up for my OTF next week. I’ll be getting my boot camps in. Today is going to be my last OTF till Monday afternoon because of my schedule. Tomorrow is my dietitian check in so I’ll see what she says. 24 days till Memorial Day weekend. It’s time to commit to 31 days of working on a dream. I want it. I want it bad.

Before I sign off. Good luck to all my friends, workout partners and gym buddies who are running Broad Street. I hope it’s amazing for you. Maybe next year I’ll be running with you too. Be safe.

Till next week everyone.

Franco

Public Service Announcement 1.0

April 23, 2015 By franco Leave a Comment

Do my gym pictures or check-in’s annoy you? Here is the thing. I don’t care. There is a magic button on most of the social media applications. It says delete. It’s easy enough to do. Push it with your mouse or finger. Then I will be gone for good. I won’t take it personal. Having a friend like me who doesn’t fall down easy must be hard on you. Maybe since I’ve taken control of my heart and body lately you are running out of things to talk shit on me about. It’s okay. I am sure there is someone else in your life among shared friends that you can talk about or bully down to feel better about yourself. But while you sit there on the couch getting fatter and hating yourself more, making excuses.. I’ll be doing my thing as best as I can. I’ll be trying to live.

Remember the New Years resolutions you joked about that I wouldn’t keep even though I don’t make them EVER? Well I’ve been through 2 years worth on this journey at this point and I haven’t given up. How are yours working out for you? And you know what I could just say, GFYA. But if you ever decide to put your feet on the ground and move forward… I’ll still be there there help you if you need me because that’s how I was raised.

My parents… my beloved grandma.. would give people their last mouthful of food if someone needed it. My father has fully clothed people who couldn’t afford clothes for work… If you needed me to walk with you… lift with you. push you.. I’d be there. I can’t do it for you. That’s for sure. You talked shit when I sat here and played online all day and now that I am moving around and doing things you found something else to hate. That’s okay. I still love you. I hope you figure out how to love yourself someday too.

And you might say that this rant was just geared for someone special but it wasn’t. I have creepers here now I am sure as well as some of the little comments people post of Facebook and the truth is that it doesn’t really bother me. I think people that make comments about people who are “Obsessed” with working out etc. are jealous… and that “obsessed” is a word used mostly by the lazy. I am dedicated. That is for sure. Just like I am dedicated to my family and friends and would do just about anything for them.

On Saturday night the band played at Parx Casino. This is one of my favorite places to play. Big stage… so much fun. My boot camp friends were out in full force. I even had a few Orange Theory peeps out. My fitfam supports me inside and outside the gym and that is an amazing feeling. The show was fantastic. I felt really good getting into a new pair of size 46 jeans I had bought that day. That seems to roughly be the size I’m creeping at right now. I am okay with that. 42 is my goal. If you are a size 42 you can get pants pretty much anywhere. Kmart. Walmart. Anywhere. Not that I want jeans form Kmart but it’s nice to know that god forbid I rip a pair of pants on the road with the band that I can go anywhere and get hooked up.

Sunday came and it was fight day at the FOP in Philly. My gym buddy Jason was fighting. It was a charity Cop vs Fire bout. He won. It was a fun day in the sun. Lot’s of food and drinks. I let myself have fun. It’s a battle between head and heart. But sometimes you need to let your body have stuff. I think it usually helps me get off a plateau. I am not talking about going ape shit. Just enough to mix things up. My friend Mary runs the FOP and she was not a good influence for sure. Pizza, fries, cheese steak egg rolls. You name it. But moderation was key.

Jason fought like a beast. He’s lost about 40 pounds at Dan Campos Fitness plus his sparring and fight training. He had so much heart and in the end I think having us all there yelling and screaming for him made him push hard and pull it off. It was a great moment. I was getting chocked up quite honestly because I know what it’s like to work so hard to pull something you want to badly off. He did it. It is definitely an inspiration. Having the gym crew there was awesome. I had a fantastic day.

Monday came and it was back to work. I wasn’t stupid enough to get on a scale. Just got up. Hit boot camp and then went to OTF later in the afternoon.

The aftermath of Mary at the FOP putting a munchie order in!

Tuesday came and I squeaked in a boot camp. I did get on the scale and it wasn’t as bad as I thought. About the same as the last weigh in and I was okay with that since I went a little crazy on the Cheese Steak Egg Rolls at the FOP on Sunday! But I rested the rest of the day. My eating was a little bonkers. I have been craving salt something fierce. That bag of potato chips didn’t know what hit it.

Wednesday the scale was even better. Much, much closer to re-hitting the goal. My body seems to be bouncing back some and letting me burn again. Maybe I am busting through this plateau again after all. Heading to boot camp and OTF.

Thursday is here. Happy Weigh-in Thursday everyone! I am glad that I started writing this a little earlier in the week because I just seem to forget a lot of stuff when I try to write a blog really quickly on Thursday morning before running all over the place. Today I am going to give my body the day to relax and recover and then give it a good whack at OTF tonight. Going to go abuse Nick for a class. Even when I think a work out is really hard or feel that I am not doing as best as I want to, the calorie burn per hour of working out still seems to fall around 650 calories burned. It costs me $5 bucks in tolls, gas and about an hour round trip form home to get to the Willow Grove location, but it’s worth it. It’s pushing me to not fear things. I am very close to hitting the button on a 5K at this point and I am very close to actually walking a 26.1 mile marathon in 3 – 3 1/2 weeks for their marathon contest that I started 7 days late. The one thing I have working for me most days is that I have time. I know time is a precious thing and I am glad that I have it right now

I re-hit the damn 100 pound goal :) — I re-hit the damn 100 pound goal 🙂

Well it is weigh in Thursday and I am happy to say after the two weeks of weight gain and my body revolting after hitting my 100lb goal, that I am now 11.7 away from my second goal of getting under 300 lbs by Memorial Day. I rehit the 100lb mark and was 311.7 this morning. So now the focus can be not on the 5 pounds that came back two weeks ago after telling everyone I lost 100 lbs but now that my body and I have come to a new understanding, we’ll move forward together. 11.7 pounds and that helicopter ride is mine. We are back in business. #cantstopwontstop

In 24 days I’ll be getting on a plane to visit my family in North Carolina. That’s where this all gets put to the test. That’s where my goal of fitting in airplane seats and getting to do stuff that most people can do gets pushed out there for better or for worse. I am excited and nervous all at the same time. More on that later.

I hope that I didn’t babble too much today. there is so much more that I wanted to write today so maybe this week I’ll have to post more than once. I have people who have asked me what my workout routine is and what supplements that I take, what apps I use. I am a pretty sure I blogged about it all before but I’ll list it all out for you and make it easy to find. There are a few things that I wanted to tell you that have happened over the last few days but there is time.

I hope everyone had a great week and a great weekend is in your future.

As always, feel free to comment, tweet, email.

Much Love,

Franco

Getting a surprise visit from the Palo’s!

Jess and I in the park for her family photo shoot

Everything They Say Is True

April 16, 2015 By franco 2 Comments

I don’t mind when they say that I’m going nowhere
And when they’re talking trash about me, man I just don’t care
They can say what they want, but forgive them, Lord
They know not what they do
But when they talk about the things that I’d do for you
Then baby everything they say is true – Tommy Conwell

NPC champ and friend Nicole shouting out some love.

I have to begin this week by thanking everyone for the outpouring of love that I received over the past week. I was told that I love that praise or what not. Everyone loves the kindness aspect of it. And although it’s nice. I enjoyed the comments on my blog more than anything. I guess it’s the guy with the English degree in me that loves to write in first person. Being told that some of the trainers got emails from people looking for a change or for guidance. That makes putting myself out there worth it. Ironically enough, I don’t take compliments well. I am too used to ridicule and people talking about me behind my back. Those same people don’t usually realize that in this day and age that we are all surrounded my snakes and that I hear everything. I see everything. And that’s okay. Haters are usually people that want to be you…. Why the hell would anyone want to be me? But if this blog, this journey, helps 1 person, inspires 1 person. Then the over sharing, the self reflection and honesty that it takes to write it was all worth it.

I have always liked the end of the movie “Father’s Day”. It’s where

Philadelphia Union Goalie and long time friend, Johnny Mac shouting out some love.

grandma talks about marriage and life. It’s about roller coasters. and the ups and downs of life.. the plateau where life lets you catch your breath and then throws you back down the tracks. Well that is what things feel like right now. I lost so much weight in a short amount of time that my body has fought back a little this past week. When I got on the scale Monday morning, I just about shit my pants. I had gained 5 pounds from Thursday’s record breaking weigh in. FUCK ME! But I walked up the steps, had breakfast and left for boot camp. A few hours later I was at Orange Theory Fitness to finish up my half marathon. So this morning at what I call my weekly “Official” weigh in – I was still 2 pounds heavier than last week and with those back at 98 pounds lost. I’m sorry. I suck. The 1500 calories I am trying to stay under, the 2 workouts a day. I suck. My body caught up to me.

But that’s okay. By tomorrow I’ll have gone to OTF for 5 days straight. Sunday we did a 90 minute workout and I burned over 1000 calories. I’ve been there every day since burning an average of 650 calories. 4200 calories burned in this weeks go at OTF. I have to be doing something right, right? Add in 4 – 5 boot camps. I will get there. 14 pounds to get me under 300. 40 days to do it. I can do it. I am focused on doing it. I can only do my best. So I am not letting these 2 pounds get the best of me. I am not running into Wawa for Tastycakes and free coffee today.

Speaking of Orange Theory Fitness. Can I tell you how much I love it there? Sure everyone wants to tell me how expensive it is. But with the very planned out workout, instructor up your ass and only 22 people tops in each class, it’s like getting personal training for that price. Where else I am gonna burn 650 calories plus in an hour? I don’t have the self control to do it in the gym all alone. I can’t focus. I already tune out the world and get lost in my own thoughts. Well, anyway… They did a 90 minute workout this past Sunday and I wanted to burn 1000 calories and I nailed it. It was close but I got it. It felt amazing. So the scale really messed me up a little on Monday morning. But at 3pm I was in Willow Grove on a treadmill getting it.

My Marathon shirt in an XL and Adrienne gave me a OTF xxl to hold me over in case it didn’t fit. But it does 🙂

They ran a promotion in April called the OTF marathon. Everyone threw in 15 bucks and if you are a power walker like me you have to walk 13.1 miles in a month ( a half marathon) – If you are a jogger or runner then it’s a full marathon at 26.2 miles. Then you win a limited edition T-Shirt and can get medals and stuff. It’s fun and motivating. Well I didn’t decide to do it till the 7th and in about a week already hit my half marathon. Got my shirt. Felt awesome. In 7 or 8 classes I had walked a half marathon there. WOW. Who am I? How’s that for a non scale victory?

Amber and I went to Destination XL the other night. I thought for some reason that I would be able to get into some smaller jeans and was so excited to get a few new cool things to wear this weekend with the band. That didn’t work out well for me. And all of a sudden I was size 66 jeans Franco looking in the mirror again. It was 1998 all over again. Or even 2013’s size 60. Frustration and shame washed over me. I didn’t want to get just 1 size smaller than what I already had. I think my head thought that since I had hit my goal that i needed to jump a few sizes since xmas but the truth of the matter is that I am only really down 12-15 pounds since xmas. I actually gained weight in February trying to eat my macros. Ugh. So that shopping trip sucked! But it is what it is. That’s what makes it a journey. That’s why unfortunately it’s not for the weak. You have to be able to push through. You are important. Your story is important. And if it was easy everyone would do it.

To put things into a closing perspective. This bag that I am pictured carrying has 100 pounds of sand in it. It’s incredibly hard and awkward to carry at boot camp. I was almost in tears walking across the floor with it. 16 months ago I was carrying that weight everywhere I went. No wonder my feet were always on fire and filled with arthritis. It just completely overwhelmed me. I could dwell and be upset about letting that happen to me again but I chose to just celebrate it and move forward. I am changing. I am making better decisions. I am trying. 4

I have to sign out of there for the day. Heading to the shore to get phase one of opening the shore house ready! Wish it was a little sunnier but it’s still the shore Going to plug in some pandora, turn it up, get lost in the moment, reflect a little and come back swinging tonight for OTF and the weekend!

Again, I can’t thank you enough for the likes, comments, and love over the past week. I am not done yet. Thank you for being on my team. Thank you for being there to pick me up when I fall. Thank you for giving a shit about another person. I am blessed. Spread the love

As always follow me on Twitter and IG for more updates. New Blogs on Thursdays. So much to write today but I think I’ll shut up for now.

Keep fighting the good fight!

Much love,

Franco

My best Friend Tom and I at his restaurant this past Sunday!

Gearing up for my gym buddy’s Cop vs. Fire fight this sunday

There is No Finish Line!

April 9, 2015 By franco 6 Comments

“I took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart; I am, I am, I am.”
—Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

458 days.
1 year, 3 months, and 3 days.
65 weeks and 3 days.
10,992 hours.
659,520 minutes.
39,571,200 seconds.

458 days. That’s what it took for me to accomplish the hardest thing that I have ever set my mind on. 458 days. That’s what it took for me to realize that I really can accomplish anything that I set my mind on. 458 days. That’s what it took to show me that I am a lot stronger than I think I am. 458 days. That’s how long it took me to finally love myself the way I should have years ago. 458 days.

On January 6th, 2014, I walked into my basement. I hated going into the basement. The steps are a kinda steep and just winded me. They sucked. But that’s where the scale is. I pushed the button, watched it hit zero, drew a deep breath and got on. It took me a few seconds to realize that my eyes were closed. I opened them and looked down. 411.8 lbs. I steps off. My eyes were welling up. How did I let myself get here? What the hell am I going to do? I knew it was time to do something. As full of life and over the top I am most days, I wasn’t living life. I wasn’t the best that I could be on stage and it didn’t sit well in my heart.

If you are new to the party, and since I have never mentioned this blog directly on Facebook. Most of the people who have found it are really good at clues on Instagram, actually read, or found me by my address on Twitter, I decided that I was going to lose 100lbs. WHAT THE F%*K WAS I THINKING? Everything you need, the who, what, where and whys are in this blog. I started it for me. It ended up being for us. All of us.

I thought I could do it in a year. And when 35lbs had come off in less then two months. I got cocky. I thought I had it. I was fooling myself for sure. That’s when it gets even harder and harder. Plateau after plateau. I tried a quick fix. I knew better. But it was back to where I was years ago. Lose 15 gain 10 right back. Plateau some more.

I want to write so much today. And honestly I think I need a few days to think and reflect because I am overwhelmed. I really didn’t think I had it in me. I am glad I assembled a team for accountability.

When my birthday rolled around this year and I was still 20 pounds from my goal. I knew I had to make even more changes. If you are new here please read the last few blogs. You’ll catch up quicker than me putting it all out here again. Those changes were the missing puzzle piece.

So now what? Little goals. My next goal is to get under 300 pounds before I step on stage at Carney’s this summer, Memorial Weekend. That’s 10 pounds. So I am going to keep kicking ass.

Well today my eyes are welling up for other reasons. I lost 100bs. I did it. There was a sand bag at the gym the other day. My friend Mike told me that it was 100lbs as he handed it off the me and I struggled with it soooo much. I was carrying that around with me everywhere I went. 100lbs. Gone!

Thank you to everyone who jumped on board #teamfranco with me.

Thank you to Amber who has been dragged from workout to workout, walk to walk and everything in between. You never let me give up.

Thank you to Brandon and Brett who came from college to no snacks, no junk food and not much in the fridge and never complained about the massive amounts of chicken that has been getting served here for the last 15 months. (Well Brandon complained about the no junk food some)

Thank you to #teamfranco! You guys know who you are. You found my blogs, you sent messages of encouragement, Favorited my mindless tweets and helped pick me up when I fell. I wish I had t-shirts for all of you, because you deserve them. I couldn’t have done it without you guys. That’s where putting it out there and being accountable helped me so much.

Thank you to everyone who helped me on my fitness journey and continues to. Adam, Dan and Erica at Dan Campos Fitness. You guys are my rock. Dan provided an open door, every single day of the year. I definitely didn’t have any excuses. #teamnoexcuses

Thank you to my #DCBC family. You make me laugh, inspire me, encourage me and make working out fun. You’ve added so many new friendships and the support you give me in all the aspects of my life is overwhelming.

Thank you to my dietitian, Jillian Foley. She helped me focus my nutrition over the last 6 weeks to help me lose the last 20 pounds along with Nick, Adrienne, and Jenn at Orange Theory Fitness Willow Grove who helped me with the last 12 of those pounds over the last month. (Love you too Angela G.) I will beat the pregnant ladies on the rowers if it kills me. (You too, Superman!)

I realized this past week that there really is no finish line. The only one in the race is me. It’s a long race. And the medal is a longer, stronger, fun-filled life. It’s time to live it. I love you all. I still can’t believe I freaking pulled this off. WOW!

I am sorry this post is all over the place. I’ll do better next week I promise.

Thank you for reading.

Much Love!

Franco

Come As You Are

April 2, 2015 By franco Leave a Comment

I can’t even begin to tell you what I’ve been up to since last Thursday. I had my last strength training last Thursday and set a few person records.

245lbs deadlift, 165 bench press and 255lbs Barbell squat. Loved my second month of strength training at ‪#‎DCBC‬. I don’t compete against the others. Competing against myself is hard enough. I only post this because a year ago when I started going to Dan Campos Fitness – I was 60lbs heavier and figured I would have quit in 2 weeks. It’s been a year and I don’t see that in my future anymore. If I can do it you can too! I am taking the month of April off because I wanted to focus on hitting my goal and then fighting hard in the month of April to get under 300 pounds by May. It is doable. So I want to do it. I am still going to lift and go to boot camps.

Friday Night the band played at Ott’s Berlin and it was pretty surreal when I walked in and people I have never met were telling me how good I looked. And as you might think they are all women, they aren’t. It was mostly men. Do men really notice that stuff? I guess I do. But I always thought that was because of my artistic eye. You might think I am checking out someones ass by looking them up and down and in all honesty I am most likely checking out their sneakers. They might have a nice ass but that’s not what I am looking at.

Saturday Night we played an event for 400 steelworkers. We were treated fantastic. It was a long night on my feet.

Sunday, Amber and I went to Orange Theory for what they call a Tornado. It was pretty crazy but I did it. I have been chiseling away at things that I never really thought that I could do. It was a fast paced version of what they usually do. On the 12th they are doing a 90 minute workout and I am already signed up for that.

I did get there 5 times this week including tonight’s workout. I think it’s working very well for me so I am going to suck up the drive and get my ass there as much as I can. I am not the greatest at it. But I am doing it. Many people I tell about it roll their eyes when I tell them what it costs. But I really don’t even want to know how much money I’ve spent in the last 15 months trying to get this 100 pounds off me. Clothes, food, supplements, nothing is cheap. Nothing is free. Trainers although they want to see you succeed, also want to be paid. It’s the way it is. Everyone wants to make a living.

I am trying to rid stress from my life. It’s hard. The band is stressful. I can’t rid myself of it. I can’t care less about it. The studio only works if I push it hard. It’s a battle for sure. But more about that next time.

So I guess you want to know if I lost any weight this week. FUCK YA! I DID! I lost 2.9 pounds. So we’ll just go right ahead and call it 3 pounds.

We are 2.8 pounds away from 100 pounds lost #teamfranco. And 3 pounds is going to be the goal this week. I’d like to get to 310 and just get over the 100 pound mark. But you know that sometimes the body catches up to you so I can promise you that I’ll do my best. As much as I wanna go nutso on some pizza for Good Friday. I’ll continue to ask myself… “Is it worth it”, with my food choices. That’s all I can do.

So say a prayer for me. Workout with me. Keep me away from the bar. Let’s get this! Thank you for being a part of my team, just by reading you make me want to get better, inspire and find that Franco that’s been lost for a long time. It’s time for him to make an appearance. It’s time to get back to good.

Happy Easter!