Okay I am going to jump around a lot because I have to leave in a half hour for boot camp and it’s been a crazy week already here and it’s only Wednesday in ice covered Bucks County.
Well last Thursday Night was the final night of month 1 of strength training. I maxed out for a few personal records. I benched 150lbs, I squatted 225lbs, and I dead lifted 235lbs. Not the classes best. I didn’t break any gym records. But i beat myself and in the end that’s the only one that I am competing against. (Still don’t like that Amber benches as much as I do but I’ll fix that soon enough)
Friday morning came and as I was leaving the gym my buddy Aram was texting me that he had 2 great Ryan Adam’s tickets for The Grand in Wilmington in his cart and wanted me to go. For the first time in a long time I didn’t have an anxiety attack about fitting in the seats, or wanting an aisle seat. I was just like.. Do it. Let’s go. As much as I have a goal weight and number that I assigned myself to get to. I waned to fly. I wanted to fit in any chair possible. Why be afraid? I don’t get to to many male bonding kinda things. So let’s go enjoy music together. I was/am very excited for May 12th. The grand only seats 1200 people. It’s going to be a good night. I think I had convinced myself that I was done going to concerts, mostly because of the seat anxiety. But I love live music. It’s my business. It’s time to close my eyes and take the jump!
Friday afternoon I met with the nutritionist. She’s pretty awesome. Seems
like she walks the walk. And that’s what I like the most. She refocused me. If you ask Amber or a few of my friends… they will just say I told you so, but I was taking in to much protein and too many calories. So I’ve pulled it back to 1500-1800 calories. It’s hard. But I also had some creeper calories that I am fighting off. I didn’t realize the way DD made my coffee in the morning that it was 200 calories. I rarely logged it because I thought it was like 50 calories. No big deal. So for the past few days, I’ve been experimenting with my own creamers, sugars, stevia and trying to find a balance that I can tolerate and keeping it under 100 calories if possible. I need that damn coffee. The world is a better place for me having that coffee. So Jillian. Yeah that’s her name, and I came up with realistic goals for our work together. I am not a complete moron. I think my absolute goal weight is 275lbs. I’d like to lose 2lbs a week and get under 300 before Memorial Day and I’d like to buy jeans in any reasonable store. I know I am not going to ever fit in anything at H&M and I am okay with that. I just want to go to Kohls, American Eagle and Lucky Jeans, those kinda stores and look okay in the clothes. But first things firsts. Getting to 311 and loosing that 100 pounds. We are a little off schedule but I never do things easily. I always take the zig zaging path.
When I weighed myself at her office I was 329 with clothes on. So we need to get to 327 on Friday morning when I go back. I weighed myself for you today. Well for the blog. Last week, I was 328.5 when I write you. Today I am 323lbs. BOOM! 5.5lbs have been shed. We will see how it all plays out come Friday with the nutritionist and with clothes on. I weight myself in the basement buck ass naked cause that’s who you it 🙂 I am a big guy. My clothes and shoes weight more than yours do.
My mom had this bracelet made for my dad in 1983. When I was a kid, because I’m a Jr, and I respected that, this was the one thing my father had that I always wanted. In 1999 he told me that if I lost 100 pounds that I could have it. When I did, my father told me to come To Virginia where they were living and get it. In less than two weeks I was in the car. It is one of my most prized possessions. It’s funny because as he gets older all I want now in general is a few more suits that he made. Something that I can have for the rest of my life, something that will make me smile every time I put them on, something that my pop made with his own hands. If it takes a trip to NC to get them made, then so be it. He might not have always done it in the best of ways, but he always pushed me, always wanted me to be better. My brother and sister can fight over whatever they want when my parents leave us with I hope they never do. I already have what I wanted. The suits, the bracelet and some really good memories…. I love my parents very much. I wish sometimes, we’d all just get along better in the end and that there wasn’t so much distance in miles, not heart.
As I reevaluate all my personal goals, fitness goals, and life, this bracelet, means that much more to me. Never give up. If you do, it will be your biggest regret. keep pushing forward my friends.